A Life less Internetty

by Lee Crutchley

I've been internet-starved for about a week now.

Life seems dull without the RGB.

I am one of those boring people who enjoys ignoring the world and spends her evenings glued to her computer like a moth to the light.

Not being a social butterfly, I am more likely to be seen surfing with my hands firmly on my keyboard than my feet firmly on a surfboard.

But, since I've been disconnected from the World wide Web of fun, I spent my week desperately searching for other things to do. Here's how it went.

Saturday

Black and blue was the theme. No, I'm not talking about a Sanjay Leela Bhansali Film but my bruises. It wasn't a simple 'Princess and the pea' story either. It was more of a slipping and falling and drama drama drama till I was served food covered in white sauce which miraculously acted as a pain killer.There's something special in the white sauce that my mom makes which comforts your bones like bubble wrap.

Sunday

This was Children's Day. So, I celebrated it by being myself. Took a couple of catnaps. What else do u do on  Sunday anyway?

I was all set to write one of those nosalgic blogs but, oh no! No internet.

Monday

Painted my nails bright blue. Then transparent. Then black.

Ate a salad with olives. Realised how much I love olives. They have such a perfectly cheesy quality. Weirdly enough I always took them off my food just cause I thought I didn't like them.

Tuesday

Saw a lot of goats. A lot of them. It was the day before Eid. Couldn't help but feel scared for them.

Such mixed feelngs. I do eat animals. But I feel bad too.

Hypocrite?

An issue better avoided.

Wednesday

Watched Marley and Me. Makes me cry everytime. Every single time. And I've never had a pet.

Thursday

Practised doing Smokey eye makeup on myself in preparation for a friend's wedding coming up very soon.

Makeup is something noone really ever taught me. So, I've learnt most of it on YouTube.

Friday

I watched Golmaal 3 only to avoid climbing 6 floors since my elevator wasn't working. Never understood the point of it or how spending even a Rupee on making it was justified but I guess India loves slapstick so it works.

To make my day more fruitful, I cut my fringe a bit. And in a bit of a hurry.

Working on Photoshop all the time makes me feel like I can Ctrl+Z my way out of everything in life.

Well, not quite. Definitely not haircuts.

I guess in a few days I'll have a Ctrl+N look to look forward to.

Saturday

I watched Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, Part 1. I always love it. Witches and wizards, a well imagined story, a book I never bothered to read, British accents I love to imitate and so much more.

And I can't stop staring at the nose of He-who-must-not-be-named. It's so weird but cool but weird.

Ended my week of internetless misery with an El Bandida Cosmopolitan at Sancho's, the new Mexican restaurant in Bandra.

I guess that's what Sarah Jessica Parker would've had in Mexico.

A lot happened.

A lot of introspection.

A lot of Jasmine Tea.

A lot of realisation.

I realised how much I hate eating with a fork and knife.

So a big thanks to all those people who I've dined with and have done all the cutting while I've done all the eating.

Yes, seriously.

So, I guess that makes me a Survivor?

What a Week!