Monday, December 31, 2012

DIY for the Holiday Season


For those of you who enjoy their drink and like to make it too, here's a quick and easy recipe to make Irish Cream.

·      3 eggs*
·      ½ tsp. vanilla essence
·      1½ tbsp. coffee (instant)
·      100 gm. castor sugar
·      1 tin condensed milk
·      ½ bottle whisky
·      400 gm. sterilized cream

1.     Mix all the ingredients with an electric hand-mixer in the order given above, until smooth.

2.     Fill in a glass bottle with the help of a funnel and refrigerate.

And you can print your own labels too!

Drink during party time. Or any other time.

Happy Holidays!

Tchin tchin!

* The recipe was given to me by a Parsi friend and you know how much they love their eggs.
I know it sounds strange to mix egg and whiskey. Atleast to me it does. But it tastes amazing.
If it makes you uncomfortable, you could probably skip the eggs because I don't know for how long you can keep something with raw egg in it.

Friday, December 28, 2012

Let it rain

You know how sometimes something from your past comes flashing back into your mind and you just can't get rid of the thought of how good it was.

Well, I had such a day just today.

Do you remember the triangular chocolate with the light green wrapper in the Quality Street box?

I loved it like it was a person.

I'd pick them out from the box and eat them all up and leave the longer chewy ones for my sister.

Yea, I wasn't very thoughtful and didn't care about sharing.

But, inspite of that if God decides to be kind.
And make miracles happen.
Or I have strange but beautiful luck on my side.

Let it rain.
Let it rain.
Little green triangular chocolates.


Tuesday, December 25, 2012

Things to do

1. Sing Happy Birthday to Jesus.

2. Expect a gift from Santa, if you were good this year.

3. Eat, drink, be Merry

AND don't forget to...


Saturday, December 22, 2012

Hello again

We're alive! We're alive! We're alive!
We did it! Group hug anyone?
Ok, so we didn't do anything. And nothing changed.
But why not view this as a new lease on life?

It's time to


We can finally put the stressful days filled with useless thoughts of the Apocalypse behind us. Yay!

Thursday, December 20, 2012

The End

*Terms and Conditions Apply.
Tomorrow is supposedly the day the world will come to an end.
Do you believe that?
Well, I think it's sort of silly, but it secretly gives me the heebeegeebees.
Don't you think that the World suddenly coming to an end is a pretty dumb way to die?

Whatever happens, I want to be prepared.

One of my friends who's from Dubai was joking that if the world was coming to an end, some Richie Rich would have built the World's Largest Ark by now in 'true Dubai style' and saved us all.

But if it were true, how would you live your last day on Earth?
- By panicking and buying supplies incase you survive?
- Throwing a party?
- Telling someone you love them?
- Telling someone you've never liked them?
- Waiting for answers to all of life's unanswered questions?
- Stuffing your face one last time with your favourite dessert?

I don't think there's anything to worry about.
It's all just some hoopla created by people who believe it/ want you to believe it so they can have a laugh.

Some claimed that NASA said something.
NASA said another something
Would the ending of the Mayan calendar make a difference to us?.
And what about Nostradamus' prophecy? Or did he not have one about this?
Will the galactic alignment's gravitational effect cause havoc on Earth?
Will there be a pole reversal?
Or will Planet X make an appearance?
Is it the end of Kalyug?
Are we moving into better times with a higher consciousness?

I don't know what to make of any of it.

But haven't you noticed how in every Hollywood movie on this topic, America saves the world in every kind of situation, be it aliens trying to take over the world or natural calamities, while the poor Indians sit in front of the Taj Mahal and wait for a miracle.

So, I'm going to do what we do best - sit tight and do nothing.
Because we'll have our answer soon enough.

Happy (maybe) last day on Earth!

Street art photo by me.

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Single and ready for dessert

Wall Art by Luulla

I was having a very serious conversation with a friend of mine about Lemon tarts this morning.
Because that's what we do on Wednesday mornings.
And this is how the conversation went:

Friend: Remember when we stopped at that place in Goa for a lemon tart?

Me: Yea. But was it that good?

Friend: It was. Wasn't it? How about the one we had the other day at the club?

Me: That was also good I suppose but it was also not memorable.

Friend: Really?

Me: Yea. I mean I didn't go home and think about it later.

Friend: That's what you do after eating dessert?

Me: Yea. That's what happens when you don't have a boyfriend.
You go home and think about whether your rendezvous with a new dessert really created an impression and think about whether you'd meet again.

Me: Hmmm.

Well, atleast I'm not waiting by the phone for hours for a call from a certain Mister Banoffee.

Monday, December 17, 2012

Love, light and a banana smoothie

Photo by me.
Yesterday I went to the Yoga House - my new favourite place in Bombay.
I haven't done any yoga there yet but the food is great.
The menu is full of affirmations so I had I am toning along with my banana smoothie.
And when I asked them about how the sin-free chocolate mousse is sin-free, they casually told me it's just a fancy name given to regular chocolate mousse. I found their honesty quite funny.
Or maybe once you eat it, it just washes away your sins.
That sounds possible right?

I don't know why but you just come out of there feeling like the world is a better place.
Does that make any sense?

And after having got myself a belly full of all that good stuff, I attended my very first Kirtan.
The Yoga House was having one just when I was enjoying my bowful of yogurt + granola + fruits and I decided to check it out.
I'm not a very good singer so my enthusiasm and presence lasted for only about 10 minutes.
It sort of reminded me of this.

I feel totally bubble wrapped in goodness.

Love and Light!

Saturday, December 15, 2012

Some who wander are actually lost

I've always thought of myself to be great at remembering directions and not needing a map. Ever.

And then the day I updated my iPhone software, I needed to find my way around a never before explored area and felt completely lost.
And when I opened my Maps, it looked rather blank.
I kept waiting for it to load and then I realized it had fully loaded already. 
The new maps were as blank as my face gets when I don't find a joke funny.

Apple had goofed up. There I said it.
But I only admitted it now when they finally rectified this larger than life blunder.

You can download the Google Maps App from the App Store now.

Be a Man and never ask for directions again.

Thank you Google.

Friday, December 14, 2012

Beardy Men

I feel like I've been dreaming.
Or just been living in my dreams.
I watched Karsh Kale live yet again at the Vero Moda party that they do every month. 
I may come across as a stalker/ groupie/ something else that sounds wrong but I am just a true fan of his music and ofcourse his beardy look that makes him ooze with handsomeness.

And speaking of beards, I also watched Beardyman at the Superdry store launch party.
Beardyman aka Darren Foreman is the beatboxing extraordinaire from the UK and I was lucky enough to win tickets to this party which happened to be in a mall parking lot converted into something like a nightclub.
How randomly awesome does that sound?
And our drinks were glowing. It almost felt like a scene from Life of Pi but the bioluminescence was actually just UV lights.

Almost stalker-like photography by me.
So, clearly I had more than a reason to be floating in a happy bubble that was being carried around by great weather all week.

Thank God for Beardy Men!

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

I make my world go round

Quote by Dr. Seuss. Picture by me.
Last weekend I was in Lonavla with some friends.
And I couldn't stop doing cartwheels.
It's so much fun that I think everyone should learn to do one.

Here's a step-by-step guide to doing a side-to-side cartwheel in 8 easy steps:

Assume the proper starting stance.

Decide whether to cartwheel to the left or the right.

Point one foot in the direction you will be going

Look down at the spot where you are going to place your hands.

Start your cartwheel with the arm located above your pointed foot.

Kick powerfully so your legs come off the ground.

While upside-down, look at your hands, which should be straight, firm, and balanced.

Land starting with the opposite foot.

Remember the rule of thumb: hand, hand, foot, foot. This is the basic formula for the cartwheel.
Watch videos to know how it works and don't overthink it.
And most importantly have confidence.

Be the one who makes your world go round.


*Do cartwheels if you are fit enough and capable of doing one. And at your own risk.

Saturday, December 8, 2012

If I had to use one word

I haven't written a movie review in a while.
Not like my reviews are to be taken seriously or that I'm any sort of critic but in the last few months I've watched a couple of movies, most of which were jsnxet6kvx.
If you're wondering about what that means, well, it means nothing.
Because I have no proper words to describe most of the movies I watched recently.

To give you an idea and hopefully save you from wasting a few hours of your life (considering the fact that hours are precious these days with the world coming to an end and all), here are my one word reviews for the movies I've watched. Some are movies based on books, none of which I've read.

Barfi - Inspired.
Or let's not be politically correct and just use the word copied.
Which makes me feel a bit embarrassed about it being India's official entry to the Oscars.
But then again I'm not surprised since the music and some scenes have been inspired by big Oscar favourites like Amelie, Chaplin and Life is Beautiful.

Aiyaa - Soft porn.
The songs are shocking and the director has got to be a perv.

Skyfall - eh.
Not good enough to make me use a word. They should've stopped making movies after Casino Royale.

Student of the Year - Bollywood High School Musical with Punjabis.

Life of Pi - Beautiful but tiring.
Didn't make me feel closer to God and interpretations make me feel tired. I just want to be entertained.

Argo - Amazing.
But my nervousness didn't allow me to breathe for the duration of half the movie.

Moonrise Kingdom - Cute. Perfect for a lazy weeknight.

The Twilight Saga - Breaking Dawn Part 2 - Silly but I love it.
Good Vampires killing bad vampires, falling in love with humans, becoming friends with werewolves and making human-vampire babies. How can you not love the ridiculousness of it all?

Talaash - Indian Sixth Sense.
I guessed the suspense by the middle of the movie so it wasn't all that wow.

Clearly I have too much to say and one word reviews are not happening.

Wednesday, December 5, 2012

Cheese Please

Every time I watch the movie Home Alone, I get a huge craving for Mac & Cheese when I watch Kevin getting ready to eat his bowlful of cheesy heaven before the thieves are about to visit his house.

The last time I watched it, I went around town to different restaurants just to get my fill of Mac & Cheese.
I went to Salt Water Cafe which had replaced macaroni with penne. Eeks.
It was just not the same.
And then I went to Indigo Deli which did a baked version of it.
It was so-so.
Why get creative when the original and simpler recipe is amazing?
And then I went back to Salt Water Cafe hoping that by this time they had bought some macaroni.
But then I ate penne again. And the sauce was also mushroomy. Nooo!

I still remember buying Microwave Mac & cheese in a 3 for the price of 2 pack when I was studying in London. Almost every week. My course was so stressful that I didn't have time to cook.
The truth: I couldn't cook.

Oh how I miss those days.

Anyway I had to make do with something else.
Having given up on my search for macaroni and not wanting to see the face of it's evil and not-so-identical twin - penne, I got myself the Baked Brie at Olive.
Its a mini slab of brie wrapped in filo pastry that's baked and topped with a sweet orangey syrup.

It's amazing how a small piece of cheese can make me so happy. It's like a drug!
And so the current thought that's circling my brain with a rollercoaster-like movement:
via SwissMiss.

Saturday, December 1, 2012

'Tis the season

It's December again.
'Tis the season of great weather, Christmas, lots of marzipan sweets, lights, presents, Ambedkar Jayanti, fear of the apocalypse and ofcourse Weddings.

The Tumblr blog

I may look like a teenager but I am officially in my late twenties and have a lot of friends in their late twenties. So those of you who aren't getting married this month, this is my Christmas present to you so you can have a good laugh.

And for those of you who are getting married, you can laugh at those who aren't getting married for finding this tumblr blog totally hilarious.

I don't even know if that makes any sense.

Happy Holidays!

Falalalala lalalala.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Seven Years

While day-dreaming I was thinking about everything that takes seven years to happen.

The cattleya orchid blooms.

The married get an itch.

Your chewing gum gets digested.

Your bad luck from breaking a mirror ends.

And every cell in your body regenerates and you are a brand new you.

Just felt like sharing my observation.

Have a great day!

Saturday, November 24, 2012

Currently scanning

I have never been much of a reader.
And reading for me involves using energy to focus my attention on every word.
Since that never happens, I call myself a scanner.
I scan a couple of words here and there and make some sense of it and understand my version of the story.

They say this is bad for your eyes so I try to balance it out by eating carrots. Ok, so that's not true.
So I may need to start eating ants in the near future without being on Fear Factor. Eeks.
(Someone told me they are good for your eyes? Is it protein? Or is it just a big fat lie?)

So here's what I'm currently scanning.

It's the somewhat Indian version of Bossypants.
I'm halfway through and loving it.
Honesty + sarcasm + a good sense of humour = a good read.

Here's a preview.
Book quotes via
If you want to know more, you should probably read the book since I doubt there will be a movie that will be made based on this book.

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

A weekend in Goa

Photo by me.
I spent my weekend in Goa and it was nothing but fantabulous.
I went with two of my oldest friends with whom being lame just comes naturally.
And what could be more fun than that.

This was our routine:
Wake up.
Have a beer with breakfast.
Jump into the pool.
Follow one of Oshos's 10 commandments.*
Head to the beach.
Jump into the sea.
Beer no.2.
Eat seafood.
Beer no.3.
Eat anything fried.
Swim around.
Do cartwheels on the beach.
Take bad photos on my Lomo camera.
Come home and finally bathe in the evening. (Evening baths are justified on holidays).
Dress up like lovely ladies and go out once again.
And then one of my friends would get hit on even more than a piñata.

Photo of me by me.
In the middle of all that we found time to:
- watch a movie (Argo)
- go swimsuit shopping
- do underwater photography with my iPhone (Yes, I have courage and a scubasuit)
- and find doppelgangers - Kenny G and Yash Birla.

The only low point was when a Sadhu-like man tried to charge me 100 rupees to take a picture with his elephant. I told him are you serious? It's an animal.

Minus 100 points to Goa.
But it's still heavenly.

*And if you're wondering which of Osho's commanments we managed to follow, it was No.8:
Do not swim. Float.

Wednesday, November 14, 2012

Happy Children's Day

When I was a child, I just couldn't wait to grow up.
Be an adult and be able to understand all the things adults told me I wouldn't understand.
My sister was my role model and I wanted to do everything she did.
And I wanted to be everything she wanted to be.
Not much has changed for me since then.

She is only 3 years older than I am but back then she was the cool adult in my life who taught me the meaning of gay as two men who love each other. It was a lot to digest at age 8 but she was the one I  never questioned and always took advice from. When she was a teenager I was a tenager (lame word coined by my sister). 

She would dream of one day going to the Himalayas to meet Shiva (the God).
And at the same time wanted to travel to America to meet Madonna and Tina Turner.
And also wanted to wear fingerless gloves and break dance like Michael Jackson.

I can say a lot has changed for her since then.

When I think back about what I was like as a child, there's just so much that comes to my mind.
It's all quite funny now and so I thought I'd share it today.

1. I watched He-Man on TV everyday and played with the Skeletor action figure for a chunk of my childhood. I'd like to say I was innocent and didn't judge a book by it's cover. But, who am I kidding? *I was sort of an idiot.

2. I divided my time between playing with toy guns (I don't know what my parents were thinking) and playing board games like Chess (I played it a little wrong). I thought every child played chess.

3. I collected coins in piggie banks that were stolen by my sister. Why? Refer to Point No.1*

4. The money collected in this piggie bank was later transferred to a velvet jewelry box with Neshaya's Bank written on it in green crayon. Neshaya was a cool combination of my sister's and my name. How clever right?

5. I bought gifts for my parents birthdays with money from this 'bank'. The gifts included a waterproof ashtray and a 60 rupee perfume that was slightly sticky called Magnet. The perfume clearly took it's name seriously and I wondered why my mother never used it.

6. I used bad words without knowing what they meant like f*** and b****** till I got yelled at by my father after which if me or my sister used them by accident, it was used to blackmail each other. What fun! And then we had safe words like basket. Which sounded close to the bad word but couldn't get us blackmailed.

7. I wrote words like Boobless on the calculator and thought it was hilarious. Clearly Leet could crack me up. Ah! The simple joys!

8. I never walked into my living room. I simply entered it with a cartwheel everytime.

9. I tried to throw my lunch out of the window because I hated eating vegetables and with my amazing luck it landed on a man's head.

10. I pinched a man's arse in the fish market after he pinched mine. A pinch for a pinch.

11. I thought dinosaurs never existed and were simply created by Steven Spielberg for the Jurassic Park movie. I also thought pirates were fictional characters.

12. I thought Baroda was abroad. Anagram confusion!

13. My worst nightmare was Paresh Rawal chasing me on a cycle around Shivaji Park.

14. I didn't find the photographer who took my first passport photo handsome enough to take my photo (at age 5) and so my first passport has the grumpiest face ever.

15. I loved watching Mahabharat but had no idea what was going on and just loved how they all had suns shining behind their headgear.

16. I thought that the people of Canada spoke Kannada. My sister corrected me and told me they spoke Canadian. Who was stupider? - that is something we will never know.

17. I had many friends who were much older than I was since my sister refused to play games with me. She would pretend to be very cool and adult like and write non-rhyming poetry.

18. I could tell time by hearing the Bhajans playing in the temple in my building on my way to school. So one bhajan didn't give me a good feeling because when I heard it, I knew I was late for school.

19. I learnt all the Hindi movie song tunes by listening to the band playing outside the Gurudwara down my road where there were weddings almost everyday.

20. I thought there were numbers only till 20.

21. I thought that if I spoke too much, the voice in my voicebox would get over. So I only spoke when it was necessary. Once I found out that that's not how it works, I tried to make up for all that quiet time. And I'm still not done as you can see.

22. If I would eat too much, my stomach would expand and look like a globe and I'd get worried that I was with child.

23. At the same time I was very confident that by the time I grew up and was about to have a child, 'the scientists' would find a new way to deliver babies. Because what else have they got to do anyway?
This is also why I loved the Japanese story of Momotaro - the Peach boy.

24. I pretend smoked/ ate Phantom ciggies which I bought from the corner Irani shop. It doubled up as lipstick when I wanted to sport a 'Paan eaten' look.

25. I loved dressing up and matched everything I was wearing in an almost OCD way.

26.  I told a doctor that the Mid-Day newspaper and strong perfumes made me sneeze and sometimes cough which in turn made my chin itch. Help!

27. I would enter every contest especially the drawing ones. I won Rs. 100 vouchers with which I bought an Asterix which I never read and a book on The Ox (that's what I am according to Chinese Astrology) also still not read by me.

28. I wished to one day run out of eye and nose fluids. It would also make sad moments a lot easier right?

29. I would cry for really silly things in movies like when a dog would learn to swim.

30. I was oddly positive. I was in the middle of the Sikkim landslides in the summer of '96 but thought there was no way I could die because my life line on my palm seemed really long and tackled a tough day with a smile.

31. I was never taught how to pray and never knew how to start so always started with 'Dear God I'm sorry I don't pray everyday but I'm sure you understand because you made me'.

32. I would watch the Bold and the Beautiful everyday and thought that only American's french kissed.

33. I thought that because was the longest word EVER even though at the same time I was probably singing Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious. And so I used because in every sentence because I thought using it made me sound like I was speaking Einstein.

34. I also used words like meaniac and cheapstake and thought that they actually existed in the English dictionary.

35. I had something against odd numbers. Don't ask. Actually I still do. Which is why I won't end this post now with 35 points (even though I sometimes don't mind multiples of 5).

36. I was worried about the world coming to an end in 2012. But then again I thought it was so far away and that when that day came I'd be 27 - an adult, probably married with children. I would either be mentally capable to handle such an event by this age or the scientists would have come up with a solution.

Well, none of that happened.
I suppose somewhere deep down I'm still a child.
Whatever has happened - weird and normal has made me who I am.
And I wouldn't trade any of it for the world.
And going forward, all I can say is:

And there's so much more to say but let's just save that for next year.

Happy Children's Day! 

Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Happy Diwali

Photo by me
I love parties. The happy energy you feel is almost unreal. Or is it just me?
I attended a school friend's Diwali party last night.
He told us it would be a 'card party' like most Diwali parties are these days.
I clearly didn't take him seriously and went for the party with my dancing shoes on.
I reached his house and the living room was full of specially created card-playing areas.
And since I was the Teen Patti virgin, I was put at the Kacha Limboo table.

I learnt a bit. Cheated. Stole counters. Did something called Sideshow. And lost 100 rupees only.
Not because I played well but because I was at the Kacha Limboo table.

So tell me something. What is the connection between Diwali and playing cards?
Is it because the Goddess Laxmi enters the house, and brings wealth and good fortune along with her?
But then what about the people who lose money?
I'm confused.

Being the Kacha Limboo that I was, I didn't enjoy playing the game.
Because let's face it, who enjoys losing?
Or playing a game they don't understand?
To me it was like playing golf.
But with cards.
Does that make any sense?

I have no idea what game I was even playing and within 20 minutes I was requesting others to start playing easier mindless games like Bluff
just dance like we did in the old days.

What ever happened to that?

Looks like I'll have to enrol myself in some sort of Teen Patti bootcamp before next Diwali.

And hopefully till then I'll find a reason to dance everyday.

Hope you do too.
Happy Diwali!

Saturday, November 3, 2012

Spot the difference

On this lazy Saturday morning as I was doing nothing, a lightbulb went off in my head.

Dr No in You Only Live Twice.
I realised Dr No (the bad guy in some old Bond movies) has been quite an inspiration to many.

And in all fields:

First there was movies...
Dr Evil in Austin Powers.
Then music...
Cee lo Green on The Voice.
And finally fashion...
Karl Lagerfeld as seen in Harper's Bazaar.
I thought it was hilarious and had to share my genius observation.

Have a good weekend!

Thursday, November 1, 2012

Craig. Daniel Craig.

Skyfall, the new James Bond movie is releasing here today and I can't wait to watch it.
The reason - 100% Daniel Craig.

The first Bond movie I watched was probably Goldeneye in 1995. I remember loving the song. And I thought Pierce Brosnan was the shizzle and could never be replaced by another Bond ever again.

And then when Daniel Craig waltzed in as the new Bond, I remember being disappointed.
And then I watched Casino Royale and everything changed.

Daniel Craig was so perfectly cast. Such a manly man!
He was so much more than being about the gadgets, the women and the martinis.

And made me think about how Pierce Brosnan should have stuck to being Remington Steele.
Don't you agree?

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Happy Halloween

I have a new obsession. Seeds.
Yes, you read that correctly. I love seeds.

I have been munching on pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds and even lotus seeds.
They're supposed to be quite healthy.
Disclaimer: If you go crazy eating too many of them like me and can't manage doing things in moderation, you can get fat.

I think that if I manage to drink enough water, get some sun and give my tummy some TLC, I may just start to look like I'm a part of a Van Gogh or maybe even like a Monet (from a distance).

So, if you're celebrating Halloween and thinking of going pumpkin shopping, pay me a visit.

And get a sunflower and lotus free.

Happy Halloween!
calendar by Anne Geddes

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Finders Keepers

If Samsung can be sued by Apple,

Can Apple be sued by Piccaso?

Picasso's Two Characters as my Desktop Wallpaper.
Does anything look familiar?
Do we call this inspired or pure coincidence?

Monday, October 29, 2012

Keep Calm and Eat Cake

Times of India, 18 October 2012

I read this article a few days ago.
I found it extremely funny that someone writes such articles.
And the picture is hilarious. I will take one just like it on my next birthday. Just because...

But then I realised half the points mentioned apply to me.
I won't tell you which ones but I suppose it means I'm halfway there.

I had a minor panic attack and then I found multiple ways to relax.
1. By trying to meditate the 21st century way with
2. By watching Cats bounce.
3. Or just by showering myself with compliments.

I'd go with No.3. And you can just keep them coming.
If you're desperate and own a Mac, block the text and right click it and hit 'Start Speaking'.
And when you're satisfied you can make a poster of it. Genius!
via piccsy

Relaxing solutions via SwissMiss.

Sunday, October 28, 2012

App Love

If you didn't love the iPhone enough already, here's one more reason to love it.

My friend, Mallika introduced me to one of the greatest inventions of all time - The Ultrasonic Repeller App.

This App uses ultrasound to keep mosquitoes and whole bunch of other stuff away.
With my 'Oh so positive' blood type, I can never fall into the category of Once bitten twice shy.
Unfortunately for me it's always been Once bitten always bitten.

But, that's about to change now that I'm armed with my Ultrasonic Repeller.
So, from now on as long as my phone is charged, I will be walking with an air of confidence when surrounded by insects, rodents, dogs and even people!

Ok, so I'm not so sure about the people part but it sounds good enough anyway.

And it's free!

Saturday, October 27, 2012

If Yan can cook...

Yesterday's blogpost made me feel a little guilty.
You know - the regular animal eating guilt.

And then I came up with my own Recipe since apparently Guilt makes the heart grow creativity.
So here it is!

Food that tastes like meat but isn't!

The masterpiece we are trying to recreate: Salami on Toast.

The cheap knockoff: Feta + a little Dijon mustard on Toast.

If I had to explain it the Masterchef way, I'd say "Ooh, it's got that right amount of saltiness and acidity. And the mustard gives it that extra punch. It's just got the perfect balance. Well done!"
And in George Calombaris' words Yum! Yum! Yum!

It seems to work for me!

Clearly that was not much of a Recipe, but I believe If Yan can cook, So can I!



Watch this space for more culinary adventures.

Friday, October 26, 2012


For the past couple of months my sister and I have been calling ourselves vegetarians for some reason when we are clearly NOT.

I feel like a big fat hypocrite when on the one hand I think about how killing animals is so cruel and on the other hand enjoy many meals where these very same animals are well, the main ingredient.

Since the only non-vegetarian food I eat is chicken and seafood, in my defense I say well chickens are sort of bred for slaughter (I know. I am Cruella De Vil's evil twin) and anything that swims ought to swim faster if it doesn't want to be eaten by me.

Whereas my sister truly believes that she has become a complete vegetarian even when her mouth is watering while watching the Masterchef contestants barbecuing meat.

These days she reminds me of Alex, the lion from Madagascar who's hunting and meat craving nature begins to show when sent out into the wild. I am a bit worried.

I on the other hand stopped eating goats and animals larger than goats when I was a child. *
My explanation: It makes me feel like I'm eating a pet.
My explanation according to my family: Goats walk on the road. So I don't eat them.
Well, I was a weird little child so it's not completely unbelievable that I said that.
And who knows, maybe I told myself chickens walked on clouds.

* Except when it's circular and rhymes with Palami.**
**Palami is a made up word.

Monday, October 1, 2012

La la la la la

I was woken up this morning by my dear sister to confirm and fully understand the lyrics of a Bollywood item number while I was in pirate mode.*

My sister, Aku loves to sing and dance at any time of the day. She could be eating breakfast, watching TV or even at work and is completely oblivious to whatever's happening around her while she's performing.

She has done such things like pirouette into a room singing a tacky deodorant jingle.

But today she decided to wake me up to ask me why Katrina Kaif sings:
Aayi Chikni chameli
Something some-eli
Kawwa chadha ke aayi.

So that's what she's been singing for the past few months.
And all of a sudden today she decided to ask me why gyrating Katrina helped a crow climb up - which is what I'm guessing Kawwa chadha ke aayi means.

I burst out laughing and then this is how our conversation went:
Me: It's not Kawwa. It's Mahua.
Aku: Isn't Mahua a flower?
Me (with a lot of confidence): No silly, it's a honey flavoured alcohol (whatever that is).
Aku: Oh ok.
Me: How does Kawwa chadha ke aayi make any sense? Especially when she's making a drinking action.

Shes actually singing Pawwa (quarter) chadha ke aayi.

Clearly my Hindi isn't very good.
And neither are my listening skills.
After all I am known to sing my own lyrics all the time.

In the past I have confidently sung:
Don't Cry for me Argentina.
The truth is I never loved (left) you.

Then there were times when I was channeling my inner Columbus and sang:
I believe I've found America (a miracle) in you.

And then ofcourse there was Alane.
Here I just sang some crap through the entire song.

I'm sure Madonna, Michael Learns to Rock and Wes wouldn't be too happy about that.
I think i should just stick to singing la la la la la when I don't know the words.

* Every morning for about an hour after I wake up I only open one eye at a time because both eyes is just too hard. I check my emails and read the enwspaper in this half awake-half asleep state that makes me resemble a pirate.

Saturday, August 4, 2012

Looks Do Matter

For some reason I always thought of The Times of India to be a serious newspaper.
And then I read this article and I didn't know whether to feel happy about next year or wonder how many people waste their lives doing such pointless surveys.

The Times of India, 25 July 2012
[Click here for the full article]
Will I feel sexiest next year?
Or is it just rubbish used to fill in newspaper pages and give hope to girls nearing their 30s?
Will I go back to regular girl mode at 29?

I don't see much changing in my life by next year.
I'll most probably turn vegetarian (besides when I eat Chinese food ofcourse. I can't ever see myself ordering a Paneer Manchurian unfortunately).

But I couldn't help but wonder who (in London) actually seriously sat down and wrote this article like it was information that people needed to have.
Whoever you are, thanks for making me laugh. It was a fun read!

The best part is the last paragraph which talks about the most inspiring female figures being:
1. Kate Middleton
2. Florence Nightingale
3. Marilyn Monroe
in that order.
What kind of a weird group of girls did they find for this survey?

For the moral of this story read the caption under the photo.
Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...