Tuesday, August 9, 2011

"You're Next"

Saptapadi by Atul Dodiya.
When someone says "You're Next", what do they mean?
You're next for what?
To join the circus? To go to 'The Island'? Or in line to fight with a customer care executive?
Please hold the line.

Well, In India if you're about 20 years old, it means you're next in line for marriage.

Now luckily for me, this infamous line was only thrown at me at the age of 26 since my sister was kind enough to only get married this year. All these years she was the target for questions like "So when are you getting married"? And this was asked by people who she'd meet once a year. Is it because most Indian's don't possess good conversation skills?
I found it to be quite funny till recently when I realised how tough it is to dodge such questions while they're being thrown at you. Frankly, it's worse than playing Dodge Ball. And whoever invented that game is plain cruel.

I always think of myself as way too young and with too many other plans to settle down already. And then yesterday I read that Lady Gaga is a year younger than me. And even she calls herself a Lady.
Damn you Gaga. You make me feel old.
Is it time for me to stop using the Girl Label and start pretending to be a Lady?

Sorry Mama
My mother has always been very pro marriage. She always told me that marriage is the most beautiful thing in the world. But, then again, she said childbirth is "Oh, nothing at all". 
When I'd ask her, "But how do you know you're making the right decision?", she'd tell me "You just know". 
I love how those three words make such an acceptable explanation - easy, believeable and at the same time it's still not giving you answers.
Just like fairytales.

I've told her many times about how I want to do so many things and she's always been encouraging. Recently she watched Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara and her encouragement went to another level altogether. Thank you Zoya Akhtar
She told me "Neha, enjoy every moment of your life. Travel. You know, once you settle down and have kids, you won't be able to do all these things. Atleast not impulsively. You will have responsibilities which you can't ignore". 
It reminded me of the Amrish Puri dialogue in the last scene of Dilwale Dulhania Le Jayenge where he says "Ja Simran ja, jee le apnee zindagi". Or something like that.
My reaction: Ok, try selling marriage to me now.
And my mother said: Umm... yea so go travel and enjoy (in a softer voice) realising that she had burst her own little fairytale land bubble.

Frankly, I have nothing against marriage but, it just isn't a priority at the moment. I want to travel and explore the world. My mother thinks that all these rebellious thoughts of mine will be washed away as soon as my Prince Charming arrives.

On the one hand I think of marriage like a tattoo. You're stuck with it forever. There is divorce and laser but that's something you'd never want to put yourself through. So, I look at it this way. It's all about finding the right one.
Then, on the other hand, if my husband was something like Paul Newman, I could love him at any age.
No Problemo.

I'm just not a fan of change.
And marriage is a major change.
Do you tie the knot and suddenly feel married and different?
Or does it happen once you've changed you're Facebook Status to MARRIED?
Yes, the 21st Century is funny at another level altogether.


Sabrina said...

hehe, loved this post ! So true about paul newman ;-) Anytime. big hug and speak soon xox

Neha Kamath said...

thanks sabrina :)
paul newman forever. haha.
see u soonish.

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